Feb. 8th, 2011

slowlyunfolding: (exposed heart (art by audrey kawasaki))
I don't know what's up with me lately. There is this huge welling up of emotion from somewhere deep inside me. I could very easily burst into tears, or laughter, or both at the same time (I've done that before & it is very confusing). It's this wave of yearning that is about to crash through me. I've been reading The Voice of the Turtledove (Dean/Castiel) by [livejournal.com profile] obstinatrix again, and it's making me all sad & angsty & OMG & heartachy. This fic is helping & not helping me. Three of us were reading today, 2 on our gadgets & one an actual book. I almost got busted while reading one of the more passionate scenes at work by one of the ladies, & I really don't think I could explain to her what a) fanfic is, b)  that Priest!Misha is my kink, c) that yes, this is a story about a priest falling in love. Not enough words in the world to explain.

I dreamed this morning that I missed the bus. It was so real & vivid, I almost really thought I missed it. Turns out, my route was so packed, I was almost the last person picked up. One person got off three stops later (after we'd driven past other people without picking them up), and that person waiting at that stop was able to get on, but he had to get on at the back door.

My dream dictionary says a bus symbolizes:

According to Jung, riding on any form of public transportation suggests that you are being too conformist in your waking life. If you have a dream of being on a bus, your dreaming mind may be urging you to become more independent. A double-decker bus symbolizes the many levels of a roblem and the need to consider things from a different angle. If you are waiting at a bus stop in your dream this often represents a transitional time in your life.

That could explain why I felt so inexplicably happy when I saw the sunlight glinting off the glass of the bus in my dream as it went past with me not on it.
I think my headache is slowly ebbing away. It is ridiculously cold today & my head felt like it was freezing off when I walked to the bus station since I missed my first bus due to the boss wanting to ask me something, then, couldn't remember what it was. Stress me out much. I shall dive into a bucket of tea shortly, put on comfy pants & chill out. Which means put away my laundry. I can't keep searching through baskets in the morning for clothes. It's all disorganized & it's stressing me out. 

Also, the Electric Blanket is the bestest invention ever. I've been sleeping MUCH better through the night as I don't have to wear 3 layers of clothes to stay warm. I was a little nervous to have wires & such sticking out the end of the bed, but I'm so over that now. Except that I almost tripped myself into a coma this morning, so I will make sure they get tucked under really well tonight.

*title thanks to Feist (clicky clicky to listen to it)


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January 2015


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